I spent the best part of this morning with a very dearly beloved sister Marge, who is on her way home to the Lord, my sister Jill and my dad-in-law, Dee.
Marge is 81 and is dying, not only due to an illness in her lungs from many years of smoking, but also because it is the Lord’s timing.
As I sat with her and gently caressed her hand, she looked so beautiful and soft. Her white hair falling around her face in the little wisps the way that old folks hair goes sometimes and her skin still so incredibly young, but the best part of her was the peace in her. The Lord’s peace. Even though she is battling for every breath she takes, the fear and terror that were bed-fellows for a long time, have gone.
We all quietly shared together the joy of having Jesus at the helm of our lives and how much He is part of us as His children. She softly and in small bursts of breath, reminisced about her youth that took place on a small farm in the beautiful, enchanting area of Nottingham Road in the Natal Midlands and in amongst all these memories she shared, she talked a lot about her beloved Lord.
More than anything else, she knows she will see her Lord and soon. She can hardly believe it! She can hardly wait!
When I first began to visit her a few years ago, she was very afraid of dying and was adamant that God was going to heal her as she did not want to die without knowing that He had saved her children. Neither of these things have taken place and her faith still stands strong.
In those earlier days I did not know about the Sovereignty of God and how He works with us the way He does, and so could only agree with her, but was not quite sure about how it all worked.
Her family moved back to the coast again and took her with them and I lost touch with her. They eventually moved back to Johannesburg about 3 years ago, by which time, the Lord had very graciously taken my by the scruff and brought me down a winding, jagged path to the point that I understood that He is indeed the Sovereign LORD God and that He will bring about His Sovereign will His way and that He really does know best. He caused our paths to cross yet again to our joy.
Many times when I had visited her she would say to me, “I don’t know why I am not being healed but I know He will! “, but then one day it changed to, “I so want to go home now, but I know He is not finished with me – that is why I am still here.”
When she was in her 79th year, after having been a Christian for many of those, the Lord began to really teach her about Himself. He brought books across her paths from very deep men of God of old, like Oswald Chambers, and CT Studd and Spurgeon and others and she began to see that there was so very much more to being a Christian that she had ever imagined or previously known about. In His incredible mercy, He revealed Himself to her when she was bed-ridden, when she could no longer get out and about on her own and on an oxygen machine full-time. When she did not have the ability or desire to do just about anything in her own strength.
When she had more time on her hands than she ever thought possible only to find out she could do nothing with it, He took her into Himself and taught her to spend time with Him. She really learned to pray. She also learned to accept what was happening was of God – that He was teaching her to die to herself in Him, with Him. Beloved Lord!
Her loving testimony as a believer in a household full of unbelievers will not go to waste. There are the stirrings of a marked change in this family as their once strong, beloved lively ‘Matriarch’ has gotten gradually weaker and weaker in-front of them. On a level they are bewildered and have gone from anger to tears to pretending none of this is happening and that the lady in the bed is not really their mum, back to tears now and much tenderness towards her. They are also now asking for prayer for her. God is gracious, more gracious than we could ever begin to work out in our finite minds. He is bringing about a reconciliation in this family with her dying.
I may possibly not ever see Marge in this lifetime again, as she is very, very frail and her family are coming from all over to say a goodbye and so I will leave this time for them. She has brought such a joy and blessing into my life and I know I will see her again when her body is not broken and frail, but with a new body – a perfect body from the Lord. It is not goodbye for us as sisters, but just a moment of “Au revoir”. We did not part in tears, but with a deep spiritual joy of knowing that this is not the end, but truly just the beginning.
Bless you my beloved sister.
